hey hey hey !
December 1st was my birthday, so i'm 30, thirty, thritayyyyy! and i can't believe i'm 30 AND happy!
so i come to you today to ramble about this quite crucial moment of my life, let me just share it with you, how i survived it? well that's a whole different story...
If you want to know one thing about me, it's that i HATE MY BIRTHDAY, believe or not, it's truer than true, i am a bday freak, i memorize birthday dates, i love love love to throw bday parties, the process of gift shopping, gift wrapping, surprising the people i love, making them happy, seeing their stunned faces at my bday pranks and gifts, well i just adore that! now when it comes to MY birthday i'm Cruella De Vil, i'm birthdayZella, i'm the Queen of Hearts and every disney villain you could think of ! i hate i'm one year oldER, i hate how time flies and i hate when i'm the one who should celebrate! last year was one of the worst Birthdays ever, 29 was hard to believe, harder to accept, i know it may look ridiculous, i may even look one of those mean ladies who are afraid to get older, but i'm not believe me, walah, it just felt weirder than weird, because... i was going through stuff back then, i wasn't well, maybe that's why things got overwhelming for me and i couldnt take it, i apologize now for anything not cool my friends and family faced last year December 1st, know that it wasn't me...
now things have changed, for real... i've been thinking about it, i had a whole year to reason the thing, try to accept it, more... try to welcome it, with open arms, wiiiiiide open arms, pretend it's my long lost family member, somebody i loved and came back to my arms, a lover whose eyes make my heart melt, pretend it were my new page, my new life, my shiny bright diamond self, what the hell, why not! what is 30 after all, huh? some would say that it's just a number, but to me, 30 is a lifetime, the year i've been waiting for my whole life to feel this good, feel like a child again, 30 brought back the smile to my face, a sincere smile that comes from the heart, MY brand new heart, the heart i've been trying to heal for sometime now... looking back at the last decade of my life, i think i've done pretty well, even though i'm not where i want to be, but i sure did what i wanted to do, here, there and everywhere... why not celebrate THAT? celebrate the good health that so many can't have, can't buy, celebrate the good crystal heart that some can never have, can never buy, celebrate the adventures i lived, that some don't have the guts to go through, celebrate the family, that some cry themselves to sleep to have, celebrate the good friends that some weren't lucky to keep, celebrate my childish petite figure, that some wish to have (yeah you can laugh at this, but that's the best thing about me haha), that is to say, COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS !
to survive, welcome, embrace, accept, live your thirties, you & I need some things, crucial things here is my kit:
- your loving self: the one person who actually knows you, don't lose yourself over other people (or for other people)know yourself, love yourself unconditionally, pamper yourself, spoil yourself, you deserve it !!
-family: family is important they are the people who love you the most, unconditionally and infinitely, we need them always, forever
- friends: friends are a major blessing, if you choose them right of course, surround your loving self with those who have always been there, in your roughest times and happiest moments, those who have played a huge part in your life, those who will be happy for your success and cry over your loss (not the opposite hein !)
- positive people: surround yourself with positive people, people who will lift you higher, acquaintances, your role model, happy souls, optimistic spirits, confident people
- confidence: the one thing that will help you all the time, confidence gets you out of any trouble, have it, own it!
- do one thing that you love (or thingS) it could be what saves you from a sad reality, a complicated relationship, an issue, do what you love, it will be your safe place and secret garden, doesn't matter if it is coloring, blogging, writing, singing, fashion, reading, makeup, ANYTHING ! you'll be surprised at how much this one piece of advice could help you!
30 is the new 20, i know this for a fact, don't ever settle, feel "old", let negativity get to you, i am now flawless, i am now the person who is ready to kick some serious ass, i am now the Marwa who will make it, will love again, and never settle!
30 and Flawless, YEAH !
now here is a collage of my last decade, my best moments, my not so happy moments: